Thursday, February 02, 2006

imbolc

Blessings on this day, the turning of the wheel, the cleansing, the shifting, the quickening.

All week I have been in this zone, the time of the returning light, the promise of spring, the clearing away of the dust accumulated through the winter dark, too much darkness to see our way to clean. At my house I heat with wood, so it actually happens that my house gets EXTREMELY dusty in the winter time, and by spring I've GOT to dust every surface, shake out the cobwebs, shower every dull, dry houseplant.

Today, February 2nd, is solar Imbolc, Sunday was lunar Imbolc, the new moon in Aquarius, so my kids and I cleaned, dusted and updated every altar in the house, sprayed every room with an essential oil mist "energized" by salt water soaked crystal pieces. How very hippie! How fun! Everything fucking sparkled by the time we were done. It felt really good. Scoff if you like, but our home defintiely felt as if an energetic shift had taken place.

Two years ago today I sat in the tattoo shop adding fresh, green leaf growth to my bear tattoo, the one I wear in memorial of the baby I lost, the one I had inscribed to my body five years earlier, seven years ago today. I chose Imbolc for the application of that original work because it is the holiday the marks the slow transition of the return of the light, and though I still suffered immensely at that point, light had begun to grow on the horizon of my life. I chose to add growing, green leaves two years ago because my sweet friend who had fathered that lost baby and I were beginning to make a life together. And much in the same way that the new segment of my tattoo was halted in its progress by an unexpected turn of circumstances, leaving me still bearing an unfinished, partial work of art on my arm, so my relationship with that friend came to a screeching halt later that same year when we both succumbed to very unexpected changes in our circumstances, and now that relationship dwells in my heart and my soul waiting for some completion, some evolution or some closure.

Hmmm. I actually never thought about that till I just wrote that right this minute. I think it's high time I get this tattoo taken care of. If spritzing some crystal water around my house can make way for energetic change in my home environment, then I feel damn sure that completing the work of art etched into my very skin could propel some shift in the nature of the relationship it symbolizes.

Cool. I like getting tattooed.

And I love that man. My intention is still with him. He would never read this to know that, but it is, bless us both.

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